Friday, November 21, 2008

I guess in a way this has become more of a diary for me. A public one but from the responses I have received many are grateful. Thank you so much for all your support.

Last night was rough. He couldn't sleep and became very agitated. He actually got up and went in the bathroom. He has two nephrostomys so he does not have to urinate. But I guess the senstion was there and the only way to relieve it was to be in the bathroom. Ya know when you don't have to go, but if your in the bathoom, all of a sudden you have too. Well I guess it's something like that. But he made it there and back, he is one determined man. He had some pain last night and we had to keep hitting the button, so he wouldn't sleep cause he wanted to make sure he stayed at that level. I woke Jodie up at 5:30 and I went back to bed for an hour till the kids got up. We did get some more sleep after that....and belive it or not, he settled down and sleep almost all day. I"m keeping my fingers crossed that he sleeps tonight. Right now he is in and out. As I was talking to my mom, I went in to check on him and he was up on the end of the bed again. This is really hard to watch, his struggle with it all. He told me tonight not to worry, we will get through this. He is always my support. Not sure what i'm going to do without him. When the nurse visited today we got his pain pump increased again. I know it sounds like alot but from what i'm told you cannot overdose when you are in pain like this, and obviously he hasn't. So he does seem more comfortable and doesn't have to hit the button as much as he was. For those of you who are wondering. He is not on morphine, he is on Delaudid. Many people think that when the pain medicine is increased they are overdosed so that they die. From what I understand that is not the case, when the meds are increased they are increased on a standard schedule. What the increase can do is relax the patient enough for them to let go. Right now, Teds dosage is being increased when he askes for it because he is in pain. I can't even imagine the pain he is in, thank god for the medicines. I hope he can rest tonight, he has a big job ahead of him.